June 2011
55 posts
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“O look, look in the mirror,
O look in your distress;
Life remains a blessing...”
– WH Auden, As I Walked Out One Evening
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Clarification
Shameful and despicable selective reporting by Hosannas masquerading as free and fair journalism
Press Statement by Anon, de facto Nicest Guy On Earth from Kuala Lumpur, 30/6/2011 I refer to the ongoing smear campaign against me on the so-called news blog known as Hosannas, which at the same time denies being a hipster rag while quoting lyrics from independent folk singers who...
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Masya'Allah
One doesn’t know what IPO means, the other doesn’t know the difference between MITI and MOSTI reps or who heads AELB, a third doesn’t know what RIA stands for.
And I’m stuck at FMT.
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“Words have fallen silent like soldiers to the grave.”
– Pete Teo, I Go. This time for a friend who is still alive.
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AIM - 25/02/11
Me: You don't like bleeding heart liberals?
Anon: I like to help them bleed even more.
Me: Define 'bleeding heart'.
Anon: The kind of people who join non-mainstream media as their first job?
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“I really don’t want to go into a slanging match and pull up some of...”
– Anon, 20/02/11.
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AIM - 22/02/11
Me: Thanks. You're a dear.
Anon: Tell all your eligible friends who pass the half plus seven rule.
Me: HAHAHAHA. Are you saying I'm too young for you?
Anon: Why, are you making a tilt?
Me: No. No tilts for the next month or so, I think. Maybe once I'm less messed up.
Anon: I'll be sure to wear my good pair of pants.
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“How did I know you’d be that stupid? You seemed like a bright girl.”
– Anon, 15/02/11.
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Anon Is Mean
New tag! New topic! No story! Ergo new tag!
I’ll stop at nothing to prove a point, eh.
Let’s clarify this new tag: for the sake of brevity (heh) it will not include any exchanges from after March 13. Because that would be unfair. He’s allowed to be mean to me now.
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“What am I doing expecting rational thought from a 20-year-old.”
– Anon, 5/02/11.
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Pulp
Me: You're boring.
TZF: Better boring than bored.
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Day 19: Character You Like That Everyone Else...
Again, to the Google!
Wait, in fact, I don’t think I need to look this one up. Everyone hates Kennedy or Dawn, right?
In fact, I’m pretty sure she was on some pop culture magazine’s list of top ten most annoying characters.
Riley’s pretty high on the list, and Buffy scores quite a bit (hmph, clearly from people who didn’t understand Seasons 6 and 7).
But I sort...
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For Chrissakes
So this girl sticks some Tamil song on R’s wall, and my rudimentary grasp of the language tells me it means (more or less) “to see an angel without knowledge of time passing” (I am mangling that).
Good Lord. And I thought I was head over heels for the guy.
Poor R. Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it.
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“When you sleep with someone, your body makes a promise whether you do or not.”
– Julie Gianni, Vanilla Sky
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Day 18: Character Who Didn’t Get Enough Screen...
So much potential. I really do wish that episode with her return had been made.
She turned up midway through Season 4, and was killed off a couple episodes before the finale of Season 6. Definitely not enough.
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“Just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.”
– Tupac Shakur
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Day 16: Episode You Like That Everyone Else Hates
What? Who hates Buffy?!
I had to Google a list of the least popular episodes. So after trawling blogs and boards, it turns out quite a number of people dislike this one.
And I’ve absolutely no idea why! I mean, Giles covers The Who (between him and James Bond, I totally see why I am the way I am) and the episode is disturbing as fuck.
Now I feel like watching it again…
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“For you, a thousand times over.”
– Hassan, The Kite Runner
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Day 15: Favorite Male Villain
Oh oh oh! This one is easy. They were all sort of evil, but the most vicious and heartbreaking and oh my God why:
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“He can charm your socks off. And I think you’re pretty susceptible to...”
– OKM
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Day 14: Favorite Female Villain
Now, I’m running through all the seasons in my head. Like, is The First gender-specific?
I really had a thing for Drusilla at the start, but she got annoying. Sunday is boring, Glory is obvious.
I suppose she’s more anti-hero than villain.
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Score
Yay!
Okay, but one more call to make. Because really, it is a case of anywhere but here but there’s somewhere I’d rather be than anywhere (and it’s not here). I want to be there, not here or anywhere.
So we’ll badger the man once more tonight. Time to harness my powers of peskiness and use them wisely for a change.
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“Lord, what fools these mortals be!”
– Puck, A Midsummer-Night’s Dream Act III Scene II
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Unhinged
Me: I'm not disappointed at all. Why don't they make guys like you? Okay, actually, they do. Shannon wouldn't hold my hand unless I held his first.
Gab: SHANNON????
Me: Teoh. It's a boy.
Gab: SHANNON TEOH????
Me: Yeah...
Gab: YOU ARE DATING SHANNON TEOH?????
Me: ...
Gab: WHAT.
Me: ...
Gab: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
Me: ...
Gab: So cute.
Me: I'M SO CONFUSED.
Gab: You never told meeeee.
Me: I DID! I SWEAR I DID!
Gab: Congratulations!!!!! NO YOU DIDN'T. NO YOU DIDN'T. CONGRATULATIONS! I'm so glad you got over that Chieh boy. FUCK YEAH. Plus, Shannon is not short, right? (Am totally being a bitch.)
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“Idiot. People will talk no matter what. Why must you let your happiness go due...”
– Hani
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Duplicity
Me: If I'd known he tunai (correct?) I wouldn't have entertained his advances!
Hani: Tunai? Oh. Tunang?
Me: Is it? Okay, tunang. Sorry. Too many Touch'n'Go failures.
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RIP Ignatius Stephen
I’d like to think we all remember you. All 350,000 of us.
I started reading the Borneo Bulletin at a pretty young age (and I won’t specify because then Anon will make fun of me), but only properly after I started working for them.
And I can’t remember a day where I didn’t pull open the sheets and search for my article (first, before anything else!) and happen upon your...
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“The Welsh accent is just like the Indian accent so you’re essentially...”
– Yow Hong Chieh
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Fiction
I found Behind Blue Eyes.
I am somewhat stunned a sixteen-year-old wrote it.
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Marlin
Go write your words and leave me alone I am tired of feeling your pain of feeling of everyone’s pain (fade here).
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“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be...”
– Matthew 7:7
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Day 13: Favorite Potential Slayer
Because she’s badass.
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“Stars don’t care what you wish, and magic don’t make things better, and no one...”
– Granny Weatherwax, Witches Abroad
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Mère
Inasmuch as I dislike my mother (and Mohani, if you are reading, I’ve been thinking about our last conversation a lot lately), there are some things she’s done that I’ve really benefited from.
I won’t deny being a weird kid. In fact, I got tagged with the label sombong, proud, very arrogant. I got tagged with it a lot.
And as much as I’d like to say that I was just...
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“Because [he] is a great man. And one day if we’re very, very lucky; he may...”
– Lestrade, Sherlock
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Untitled
I feel so foolish.
I really did think you were a good person.
I’ve done it again, I guess.
I’m beginning to suspect that I just bring out the worst in men.
You’re so clever. You’re phenomenal.
I feel so confused. It shouldn’t matter, except that it does, but not in the way that it would have before, but.
Oh, why does it even matter.
You started this, you started all this. And I...
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“Honey, you’re a funny girl,”
That’s me.
I keep them in stitches, doubled in...”
– Barbra Streisand, Funny Girl
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Fell Forever
I am loving my new tattoo.
It stings, and certain people keep accidentally touching it. And I woke up this morning glued to my t-shirt.
But I am loving it.
I can’t wait to do the rest. Hell, I’ve only got one body. Might as well enjoy it.
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“For the longest time I thought I’d lost the best of me – but I’ll be...”
– The Scene Aesthetic, Come What May
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Marker
The Annex, Central Market.
Not so long ago. With Michelle.
Sad.
He’s who you could have been. Not exactly, perhaps, but close enough (even though I know you’d sneer at the idea).
I form my attachments so unhealthily.
I guess what I mean is – you could have been somebody.
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Day 12: Least Favorite Episode
Seriously, this didn’t even take thinking.
One of the most annoying episodes ever. I mean, it’s terrible.
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“My head started reeling, you gave me the feeling the room had no ceiling or...”
– The Prince, Rodgers & Hammerstein’s Cinderella
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“Never mind. Live and learn. Never trust TMI reporters.”
– Hasbee. Oh, so when I say it, nobody listens…
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Lotion
Me: Eh. Come help me put lotion on one leg, I'll do the other. Then can go eat.
Anon: Okay. Which one do you want to do?
Me: Whichever leg is closer.
Anon: ...
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“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old...”
– JRR Tolkien, The Lord Of The Rings
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Day 11: Least Favorite Romance
Seriously, no. It gaks me out. I hate when the lines cross between friendship and romance.
